Ed. Note: The first part of this article is available if you click here. It started out describing the situation many in the church office know well—caring so much about your work you are working to the point of burnout. This second part of the article tells what to do about it.
An early clue to burnout is the tendency to take yourself too seriously.
Losing the ability to laugh, especially at yourself, is a good sign all is not well. Actually, others may see signs of your burnout even before you do. But if they suggest you ease up, you will find it easy to justify your long hours. You may see others as not as dedicated as you and manufacture a whole list of “Yes, but’s:
“Yes, but if I don’t stay I will think about this work all night.”
“Yes, but if I don’t do this, no one else will.”
“Yes, but unless I stay I will be more behind tomorrow.”
Commitment is a good thing, but even good things need to be kept in proper perspective. The Christian professional’s commitment should be to God, not just to her work. God would not have you neglect your home, family, friends and self. In the long run over commitment will not enhance your service but hinder it, perhaps end it.
Often we think turning problems around calls for drastic adjustments. Sometimes remedies look so difficult we do nothing when, as a matter of fact, we could make small changes and achieve big results.
Putting these three practical steps to work will allow you to get out of the office on time—and feel good about it.
First, set realistic goals.
To succeed as a Christian professional you must acknowledge you cannot do everything. Focus on doing the most important things. Some of those “most important things” are outside the office!
A key question to ask yourself is, “What do I want to achieve through my work?”
Dream on paper. What does your perfect work week look like? How do you spend your time during and after work? How do you relate with others? How does your office look? How do you look? Think of someone who has achieved the working style you would like and use her as your role model.
Identifying the kind of assistant you want to be helps keep your life in balance. Pat never would have chosen as a role model someone as enslaved to her work as she was herself. She had no clear picture of what she wanted to achieve and therefore no clear sense of priorities.
Once you know where you want to go, use your favorite planning tool to help you get there. As you schedule each day’s activities keep clearly in mind: the total number of hours available each day, and the amount of time each task will take. Use your priority system to keep you on track. All things are not of equal importance. Remind yourself often: your goal is not to do everything but to do the most important things.
Keep a to-do list as a guide. When asked to take on a task, check your list. Agreeing to a task not only pledges your energy but your time. You must realistically avoid the trap of making more promises than you have time to keep.
Put activities on your list that move you toward your ideal work style. Promise yourself to come to work on time, take a lunch hour and breaks, and leave on time. Always give an honest day’s work so you need never feel guilty, regardless of what remains at the end of the day. Be too sharp to believe you can keep ahead of the workload by putting in extra hours several nights a week.
If you have established a pattern of over commitment, people already take it for granted you will get the work done regardless of the extra hours required, the lack of adequate equipment, the continuing need for more help.
You can break the cycle by initiating your own changes, but it may also help to talk with your supervisor. If that seems a good move, explain your need to create a better balance in your life. Give your pledge of excellence and share your plans for constructive changes in your work style.
The second step to get you out of the office on time is to begin winding down about half an hour before time to leave.
Make this your regular “wrap up and plan for tomorrow time.” Even for the most effective time manager there will always be “just one more thing.”
Set a specific time to tie up loose ends and determine what will be on the agenda for tomorrow. Commit any unfinished tasks to your planner and park them there overnight. Just before you leave the office each afternoon, praise God for what was accomplished. Congratulate yourself on a job well done. As you turn off the office lights visualize turning off all thoughts of the office until tomorrow; turn your thoughts toward home.
And finally, get out of the office on time by having a pleasant experience waiting for you after work.
Shift your thinking so you see the end of the work day not as leaving something but as going to something. Within the framework of what is possible for you, give yourself some freedom in choosing after-work activities.
Sandy likes coming home to a bubble bath and good music. Ann spends her evenings sewing for her grandchildren. Roxanne has teenagers, so she plans many of her evenings around their activities. Nancy belongs to a health spa and goes there directly from work several evenings a week to swim and exercise. Shirley enjoys coming home to her yard and garden.
It is easy to get so wrapped up in making a living that you neglect to make a life, so busy doing good things that you pass by the better things. Building a rewarding life beyond the office is one of the best things you can do for yourself and for those you serve.
No one should presume to tell you how many hours to work or how to demonstrate your commitment. You decide those things. My point is that “hours worked” are not the best measure of one’s dedication. To a far greater extent than most of use care to admit, we make the choices determining our quality of life. You know the consequences of over extending yourself. You can make choices to bring your life more into balance.
The rewards of leaving the office on time are impressive—for you and your work:
You will feel and be more in control. Once you have a realistic sense of what you want to achieve, you can give up trying to be a cross between Wonder Woman and Dear Abby. Instead of being pulled in a hundred directions you can set firm goals and work toward them. You can accept your own limitations and relax. Make up your mind once, instead of deciding every afternoon, you will leave the office on time. Having that question settled is absolutely liberating!
You will accomplish more in less time. Of all our resources, we tend to misuse time more than any other. Once you determine you will only be in the office a set number of hours, you become much more aware of how valuable your time is. You spend your minutes more wisely.
Your weekly plans keep priorities in view and help you say no to tasks that would keep you from your goals. “Discipline,” wrote Bill Vaughn, “is like broccoli. We may not care for it ourselves, but feel sure it would be good for everybody else.” Ordering your day will take some discipline, but you can do it.
The real reason for not doing so many things is not too little time, but too many excuses. Once we give up the excuses, there is room in our lives for all the things that really matter: family, friends, church, community, and self. Balanced living not only can add more years to your life, but more life to your years.
Each day do these four things:
• Spend time in prayer and in the Word.
• Move yourself closer to one of your goals.
• Perform a random act of kindness.
• Do something nice for yourself.
An added advantage to leaving the office on time—it gives you greater longevity in your work. Food for thought: How would you treat your car if you knew it was the only one you would ever have? How do you treat yourself knowing you are the only “you” you will ever have? Pace yourself, take time to refuel your body and spirit, do proper maintenance.
You can avoid a major overhaul and be around long enough to become a beautiful classic!
Cheryl Drake says
Hello Everyone,
I just wanted to tell you how much I appreciated your article on “Burnout”. My previous church closed in June. I had worked there for 15 years and the last year just about did me in. The fighting over closing, the crying people every day in my office and just disposing of everything either to Archives or the garbage pick-up. I definately worked many extra hours to accomplish everything.
Now I am at a new church and have found the learning curve just as stressful. I am very happy to be here but started the long hours once again. As of today I am going to take steps to change my way of thinking. I am sure my family will notice as I have not been around much lately.
Thank you so much for helping me to re-think my actions and how they are affecting me and those that I love.
Blessings,
Cheryl
Yvon Prehn says
Cheryl,
Thank you so much for taking the time to comment. AND I want to very much commend you for hanging in there with a church.
Working at churches can be incredibly difficult–in fact, sometimes when your church is accomplishing great things for God–the enemy takes notice and life around the church office becomes even more difficult. As I often reminded my seminar attendees in the past, your church office is the headquarters and the communication center of the spiritual warfare in your church. You are fighting for the eternal souls of people.
But at the same time–the battle is the Lords! That is why I loved Gayle’s article so much–put in your 110% while you are there–but then go home, love your family and be at peace,
Yvon